Do you develop cold feet when you talk to a girl you like? If yes, get ready to arm your self with some relevant introvert dating tips. The potency of these dating tips is not in the tips itself, but in the effort you invest. So let’s dive right into it.
This article is directed towards helping introvert guys who find it difficult to share their feelings with the opposite sex without shrinking; whether online or offline.
Overview of the introvert dating problems
The number of introverts in Nigeria is possibly on the rise. I personally like to think that there are more introverts that tend towards introversion based on the circumstances surrounding them than there are introverts born that way—genetic makeup.
Some of these circumstances could arise from parental upbringing, low self-esteem, intimidation or just nature. Every introvert should at least tick any of the aforementioned.
In recent times, there has been a call for concern about the frequent recede of introverted guys about to approach a lady they like, and possibly even get to woo her.
A typical African setting like Nigeria expects that men are the ones to shoot their shots at the person they like, and not the women. Hence, the more reason an introverted guy is forced to face his dating problems.
Evaluation of the introvert dating problems
It is generally assumed that introverted guys have a harder time dating than their extroverted counterparts. Well, the first step to take in identifying the problem, is to admit that you are the problem. Yes you, the introverted guy!
Does having to admit you are the problem startle you? Perhaps you need to breathe in and breathe out at this point. Here is exactly how I mean: Admitting you are the problem equals getting ready to win the heart of that dream girl.
Introverts, in most cases, find it difficult to keep a relationship because they always want their own space, time alone, privacy, and also expect everything to work on their terms and conditions, all the time. But as life would have it, you can not eat your cake and have it.
Introverted guys need to learn to create bonding moments with the girl they like. Especially if looking to build a long term relationship, and probably get married to this dream girl. Awwww! 😍😍😍
To the real deal: how to woo a girl
Growing up, lots of circumstances inform how free a guy is at wooing a girl. They could range from coming from an extremely religious home that keeps you from socializing to having parents that don’t think you should visit at all.
Whatever the case is with you that makes you recede from wooing that girl, the time is now to let it go. There is no longer space for self-pity or thinking you are not good enough. Get her to fall for you!
Before you ask a girl out, ask yourself these questions: What are her interests, are they same as mine? Is she an extrovert or an introvert like I am? What if she says NO?
Know what interest her
Be deliberate about discovering what interest this girl you like. You’re most likely to connect when you both share the same interest because then, there’s always something to talk about.
One time, a guy that was getting to know me asked what my dream car is. I replied, “a Lamborghini”. He smiled and asked if I also like the history of Lamborghini himself, that he had read about him. I certainly was eager to hear him tell me.
Asking interesting questions that give you insight, is how best to break the ice. Click here to get some of these questions you can ask a girl you are just getting to know.
Spend time with her
Every woman loves attention! Give her that attention. Make all the needed adjustments to accommodate that special person your heart craves, even if you would naturally mostly prefer to spend time alone.
You also have to be tactical about how you give this girl you like your attention. Be sure to build a connection between you two first. Then as you give her attention, balance it up with giving her space to miss you, so that her feelings can catch up with yours.
Make her think of you
In your communications, open up about an incident from your life that is deep and off the surface level conversation. Doing this reveals your weak side and connects you emotionally. It helps her see that you somewhat get real with her.
Also, look for ways to constantly remind her of you. Make her blush with your compliments and silly gifts—cool and not so costly stuff. Make her think of you fondly: treat her specially. Give her reasons to see you as a potential catch.
Do not friend zone yourself
Chip it in every now and then that you like her, so she doesn’t mistake you for that friend that is like a brother. Remember that there’s a very thin line between being a BFF – Best Friend Forever and a potential boyfriend.
Flirt with her—Tease her once in a while. Let her know that you think of her—Tell her when stuff reminds you of her, a certain perfume, a song, a color, etc. Just be romantic, okay?
Come right out
There is a chance she likes you already, so you might as well ask her out now, but wait! Getting a NO is not the end of the world, it’s the beginning of wisdom. Just saying, perhaps you get a no.
Test the ground before you drop the words, let it slide in your chit-chat with her friend that you like her. See how her friend reacts. Girls always gist about the guys they are starting to like. You can get subtle clues from that reaction.
Take it all gently, it’s nothing to be in a hurry about. Ask her out on a date, it could be a casual date. Then tell her how you feel.
I like to call these introvert dating tips the A-Z method of wooing your dream girl.
Many Introverts are on the table of I want to be by myself. You can’t be on this table and look forward to winning the heart of your dream girl. Like, where is the fun in you? Please by all means possible, be an interesting person.
If you’re crushing on a girl on social media, think of how to creatively slide into her DM. If she has a beautiful DP that you genuinely like, start by complimenting that. Compliment her smile if she’s wearing one in the picture.
Let your chat be creative
If she has made a post about something-something like that that you like, you can start by saying:
“Hello, how are you doing today? I saw your post about XYZ, I think I like how you think. That was apt and straight to the point. Can you teach me how to think like you?”.
OMG! Be creative. Don’t go leaving a Hi here and a Hello there on somebody’s child’s dm. Shoot your shot and aim for the post. There is no point playing balls that hit the bar and goes back to the sender, like:
Two days later:
She: (Why is this guy disturbing me.)
You will sleep in the DM ma ka chukwu!
Like what you have read? You may also like, How to love an extrovert: 3 Tips you should know
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